Have a Harry Christmas!
by Hermionehobbit
Summary: Wooohoooo! The Harry Potter Characters get to sing Christmas carols with me...or else!
1. Voldemort's a bore?

Hermionehobbit: It's Christmastime! Listen as the people from Harry Potter sing you some Christmas Carols! I do not own them blah blah blah JK Rowling owns them blah blah.  
  
Harry: What!! You said we were playing Quidditch!  
  
Voldemort: You never said anything about singing!! I will not sing!  
  
Hermionehobbit: So you don't mind me showing anyone these? *pulls out stacks of pictures* Hmmm, oh, here's one of Ron (Ron: What!?), Oh, and look how cute Voldemort is in a tu-tu. Oh, and look at Harr-  
  
Harry: Okay! I'll sing, I'll sing!  
  
Voldemort: What song did you have in mind?  
  
Hermionehobbit: *grins evilly*Hee hee hee! I knew that would get 'um. Well people, you're going to sing Jingle Bells.  
  
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  
  
~this means the words are sung~  
  
~Harry: Dashing through the sky, on my first class Firebolt, In the air I fly, hopefully falling I'll float! Oh look there is the snitch, flying across the pitch, I feel the air fly through my hair and fall into a ditch, OH!~  
  
~Voldemort: Jingle bells, Harry smells,  
  
Death Eater (DE) 1: Voldemort's a bore!  
  
Voldemort: What'd you say? I'll kill you, hey!  
  
My question's anymore?~  
  
*DE1 lies dead, the rest of the DEs back away*  
  
~Voldemort: Jingle bells, Harry smells  
  
DE2: Voldemort will rule!  
  
Voldemort: I'll Dominate, the world's my plate,  
  
and I hate seasons of yule!~  
  
~Hermione: Magic books galore, with spells for everyone. Potions on the floor, Oh homework is so fun! Defense Against Dark Arts, Arithmancy and Charms. I do the work and never shirk and do myself no harms, OH!~  
  
~Voldemort: Jingle bells, Harry smells  
  
DE3: Voldemort wears pink!  
  
Voldemort: You get a smack! I just wear black,  
  
You're go-ing in the siiiiiiiinnnnk!~  
  
*DE3 is thrown into giant boiling cauldron*  
  
Voldemort: Anyone hungry? *DEs move even farther away*  
  
Harry: *climbs out of the ditch* HEY!!! I do NOT smell, and you pushed me in there didn't you?  
  
Hermione: Let's not fight. It's the giving season after all.  
  
Voldemort: Of course it is. I "gave" him a push didn't I?  
  
Harry: Then you won't mind if I give you a sudden death, eh Voldie?  
  
Hermione: *sigh* Guys. *shakes head*  
  
Hermionehobbit: I know what you mean. That wasn't exactly the Jingle Bells I was looking for, but, oh well.  
  
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  
  
Hermionehobbit: This next song is The Tweleve Days of Christmas! *groans from everyone* Come on, It'll be fun!  
  
~~ = singing  
  
() = not singing  
  
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  
  
~Harry: On the first day of Christmas my best friend gave to me:   
  
A broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Gee, uh, thanks Ron.)~  
  
~Ron: On the second day of Christmas Hermione gave to me:   
  
Two feather quills (Ron: Hey, wait they're SUGAR quills!)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny(Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~Draco: On the third day of Christmas my Father gave to me:  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: Don't even have to think to know who to use these on. :D)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: SUGAR!!!!!!!! @.@)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~Hermione: On the fourth day of Christmas Ron gave to me:  
  
Four magic books (Hermione: Not Five?)  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: *Smirks*)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: SUGAR!!!!!!!! @.@)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~Fred: On the fifth day of Christmas my twin gave to me:  
  
Five shower curtain rings (Fred: Yes! Just what I needed...)  
  
Four magic books (Hermione: Just finished them)  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: *Smirks*)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: SUGAR!!!!!!!! @.@)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~George: On the sixth day of Christmas my twin gave to me:  
  
Six toilet seats (George: How did you know?)  
  
Five shower curtain rings (Fred: Hee hee hee...)  
  
Four magic books (Hermione: Just finished them)  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: *Smirks*)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: SUGAR!!!!!!!! @.@)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~Sirius: On the seventh day of Christmas Harry gave to me:  
  
Seven bars of soap (Sirius: Are you trying to give me a hint?)  
  
Six toilet seats (George: Heh heh heh...)  
  
Five shower curtain rings (Fred: Hee hee hee...)  
  
Four magic books (Hermione: Just finished them)  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: *Smirks*)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: SUGAR!!!!!!!! @.@)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~Lupin: On the eighth day of Christmas Dumbledore gave to me:  
  
Eight job offers (Lupin: I appreciate your help, but being chased by a bunch of parents with pitchforks is not my idea of a holiday.)  
  
Seven bars of soap (Sirius: I don't smell THAT bad)  
  
Six toilet seats (George: Heh heh heh...)  
  
Five shower curtain rings (Fred: Hee hee hee...)  
  
Four magic books (Hermione: Just finished them)  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: *Smirks*)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: SUGAR!!!!!!!! @.@)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~Wormtail: On the ninth day of Christmas Voldemort gave to me:  
  
Nine extra limbs (Wormtail: Good, I had a feeling I'd be needing them soon.)  
  
Eight job offers (Lupin: *shudders* Mobs)  
  
Seven bars of soap (Sirius: I don't smell THAT bad)  
  
Six toilet seats (George: Heh heh heh...)  
  
Five shower curtain rings (Fred: Hee hee hee...)  
  
Four magic books (Hermione: Just finished them)  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: *Smirks*)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: SUGAR!!!!!!!! @.@)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~Voldemort: On the tenth day of Christmas my Death Eaters gave to me:  
  
Ten fluffy tu-tus (Voldemort: Too bad for you I lost my sense of humor years ago)  
  
Nine extra limbs (Wormtail: You never know.)  
  
Eight job offers (Lupin: *shudders* Mobs)  
  
Seven bars of soap (Sirius: I don't smell THAT bad)  
  
Six toilet seats (George: Heh heh heh...)  
  
Five shower curtain rings (Fred: Hee hee hee...)  
  
Four magic books (Hermione: Just finished them)  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: *Smirks*)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: SUGAR!!!!!!!! @.@)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~Dumbledore: On the eleventh day of Christmas the Sorting Hat gave to me:  
  
Eleven beard trimmers (Dumbledore: How...thoughtful.)  
  
Ten fluffy tu-tus (Voldemort: Someone's going to die)  
  
Nine extra limbs (Wormtail: You never know.)  
  
Eight job offers (Lupin: *shudders* Mobs)  
  
Seven bars of soap (Sirius: I don't smell THAT bad)  
  
Six toilet seats (George: Heh heh heh...)  
  
Five shower curtain rings (Fred: Hee hee hee...)  
  
Four magic books (Hermione: Just finished them)  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: *Smirks*)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: SUGAR!!!!!!!! @.@)  
  
And a broomstick that flies funny (Harry: Okaaayyy...)~  
  
~Hermionehobbit: On the twelfth day of Christmas everyone gave to me:  
  
Twelve acceptance letters (Hermionehobbit: Yay!! Eleven friends and I are going to Hogwarts!)  
  
Eleven beard trimmers (Dumbledore: Is this a hint?)  
  
Ten fluffy tu-tus (Voldemort: Death to all!!!)  
  
Nine extra limbs (Wormtail: Ooops, there goes my leg.)  
  
Eight job offers (Lupin: I'm going to mob the Death Eaters)  
  
Seven bars of soap (Sirius: *Sniffs* what smells like rotten tomatos?)  
  
Six toilet seats (George: *plotting*)  
  
Five shower curtain rings (Fred: *plotting*)  
  
Four magic books (Hermione: I need MORE!!)  
  
Three evil potions (Draco: *Eeeevvvviiilll smirk*)  
  
Two feather quills (Ron: Su-gaaaarr...*faints* X.X)  
  
And a brooooommmstick that fliiiiesss fuuuunnnnyyyyyy! (Harry: You can have it.)~  
  
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  
  
Hermionehobbit: Did you have fun? Stay tuned for more!  
  
Everyone: *groans* 


	2. Christmas Gruel?

Hermionehobbit: Yay! Even more songs! You get to sing Deck the Halls now.  
  
Sirius: What if want to forgo that privalege?  
  
Hermionehobbit: Maybe I'll rephrase that. You HAVE to sing Deck the Halls NOW! Or I guess we could post these on AOL's front page. *Holds up pictures*  
  
Sirius: NO! I'll sing, I'll sing!  
  
~sung~  
  
..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..  
  
~Sirius: Deck the halls with heads of house elves  
  
Everyone: Falalalalalalalala  
  
Hermione: That's worse than putting them on shelves!  
  
Everyone: Falalalalalalalala  
  
Hermione:You are horrible and cruel!  
  
Everyone: Falalalalalalalala  
  
Hermione: Even worse than christmas gruel.  
  
Everyone: Falalalalalalalala~  
  
Sirius: Hey! I like gruel.  
  
Hermione: So? House elves deserve rights! How would you like me to mount your head on my mantle?  
  
Sirius: That's sick!  
  
Hermione: Of course it is!  
  
Sirus: Then why did you say it? I thought you were a nice girl Hermione. You've been spending too much time with Ron.  
  
Hermione: *blushes* I...I have not! Uhh...I don't feel like singing right now...bye! *leaves quickly*  
  
Sirius: Hey! Why does she get to leave?  
  
Hermionehobbit: Because she's a girl.  
  
Sirius: That's sexist!  
  
Hermionehobbit: Your point?  
  
Sirius: Grrrrr...  
  
Hermionehobbit: Uh-uh-uh *waves pictures*  
  
Sirius: *sulks*  
  
Hermionehobbit: It's not your fault, I just don't want to let you out of my sight. Most people still think you're dead. What would they say if they saw you skulking around?  
  
Sirius: *sigh* Oh well, but I DON'T skulk.  
  
Hermionehobbit: Sure...Okay, the next song is We Wish You a Merry Christmas  
  
..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..  
  
Harry: We wish you a Merry Christmas  
  
Ron: We wish you a Happy Birthday  
  
Sirius: We wish you Happy Halloween  
  
Lupin: And a Happy New Year!  
  
Sirius: Evil tidings we bring  
  
Harry: Of Voldemort's return  
  
Ron: And presents for your birthday  
  
Lupin: And a Happy New Year!  
  
Harry: We wish you a Happy Valentine's  
  
Ron: We wish you a Happy Birthday  
  
Sirius: We wish you Happy Thanksgiving  
  
Lupin: and a Happy New Year!  
  
..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..::::..  
  
Hermionehobbit: Okay, well, I think what they meant was Merry Christmas everyone! I seem to be out of ideas for songs. Suggestions would be appreciated. ^_^ 


End file.
